fat calling

During our training we had a session about communication with Thai people from our towns. In very general terms we talked a lot about how Americans are so direct and Thais are so indirect. There is a term in thai called “Grang Ji” which I have had hours of conversation with fellow PC volunteers trying to translate and understand. It is not a easy concept, but important as its the basis of the ways Thais speak. It is a way of being gracious, of not imposing, of looking out for the other person. The best translation I can give, is that ‘Grang Ji’-ing is saying what you think the other person wants to hear. It is a neutral word. Neither always a good thing, or always a bad thing, although more often it is a good thing because in Thailand it’s seen as good to be generous and giving.

A good example is escaping me, but for instance if a Thai said he was going on a trip tomorrow, he would immediately follow it by, do you want to go too? And this gets into a tricky situation, because I can not yet (maybe never will) be able to tell when they sincerely want me to do something or are just ‘Grang-Ji’-ing (offering to be nice). Very often they really do want you to sit in last empty seat on the bus, or finish the food you are sharing, or take the present they are offering. The Thais are just that way.

Although, in a confusing twist of things they love to talk about things that we deem as “sensitive” to talk about. Weight is the number one example. They LOVE to say people are fat. “He’s Fat.” “The fat student.” “I’m fat,” but the kicker is they love to say “You’re fat.” Or “You’ve gained weight.” It does not have the negative meanings it does in the states, but I have yet to wrap my mind around it. I am pretty sure being fat is a negative thing here. It certainly is becoming more so, as I hear anorexia is on the rise w all the western pop images they see, and people talk about wanting to lose weight. It’s hard to not look at the Fat calling through my own perceptions of calling someone “Fat,” but I don’t think it’s as negative here. Part of the fat calling is that it’s a way to say you are close enough friends w a person to call them fat. I really don’t get it.